late nights. little sleep.

so i guess when you don't have a full time job it becomes okay to stay up all hours of the night and sleep in really late. at least that is what i keep telling myself. i am so glad to do it. my time has been filled with such laughter. staying up all night to watch the last season of west wing. it seemed like the most logical answer when cole and i asked ourselves "what shall we do tonight when we have to take joe and lo to the airport at five am?" it only took about 12 seconds to convince ourselves that no sleep the night before thanksgiving was the perfect idea. and it was. a great show, popcorn, marshmellows, apple sauce and seven up left us with a 5am drive in which i couldn't stop giggling because i can't remember the last time i stayed up past 12 let alone all night and cole giggling because he was making fun of me for feeling like such a rebel.

so, I sit here now at almost 2am, having to work at 8am and i can't sleep because i have been sleeping until 11am lately.

at the moment, i have been captured by great music that moves my soul to a place of slow motion pictures shot in the raw, sun filtering through, bluring the harsh details and illuminating the ocean, the breeze and everything that is fond memories of peace and love.

"so listen up, the sun hasn't set, i refuse to believe that it's only me feeling..."

only me feeling my my whole body move in suttle motion to the love that is moving in this place. the love that is moving us to betterness. the love that is moving us to notice. moving us.

my snapshots of love: i love you thiiiiis much.

let go. jump in.

I sit at my desk. Preparing for my few days of 'alone time.' I am burnt out, tired. I am bored at work. I know that I am not in the place that allows me to mesh my daily life with my passions and calling from the one who created me. So, I need time. I need time to step back, sit in my thoughts, reconnect with my heart and figure out what the hell I am doing with my life. I giggle as I type that: what the hell I am doing with my life? It seems so dramatic, so over the top. But, here I am, my messy desk at work, patience lost and so unmotivated to do anything this job requires. I should take time to figure this out. I need to take time to center myself back into who I really am, caring about the things that are important to me. So, here I go. I guess I will fill you in on how it went... See you in a few days.

I want to speak every word from conviction and passion.

This is freedom...

We sit on the floor. All absorbed in the canvases we are creating. Our voices sing loud to the soul music that seeps through the speakers and we connect. No words to each other. It is just our unannounced emotions being heard through the swaying beauty in the air. This room is my freedom. In this room I am known. In this room I am understood. In this room I am apreciated for my presence. I am so tired now, but I can not walk away from this place. We are clinging to these moments. We know that tomorrow brings the have-tos, need-tos, want-tos and we are not ready for it. I want to find a place where this can be my reality. Where I make this my priority and my lifestyle. Wouldn't that be nice.

We are the art of this world.

I feel this urge upon me to share. Let this piece inside of me out. Here she comes with wind and color behind her. Here she comes in the flowing of the words and the meshing of the verses. We are one and we share the same desires. The same hopes for love and being known. My desire is deep down, running in circles. The pep rally is over and she is crying to be heard. We are one. There is no division. What is this hatred. What is this aloneness. What is this entitlement. We are one. We share the same desires yet we do not live them out together. You and I, we can conquer the world. We can let them know that they are loved. We can let them know that they are heard and our lives are more than just the money we make. We are more than just the people we walk past everyday. We are bright colors mixing and turning, spilling out on the canvas, making masterpieces. We are one. We can make art together. Lets make art together.